Top left to right. 2020 wedding day picture by Karen Smith; 1978 picture taken at the school library by parents; 1971 picture taken by parents; 1983 sunbathing in the snow in Myrtle Beach, SC, USA, picture taken by parents. 1990 Christmas, picture taken by parents. 1986 Vancouver farewell party, picture taken by a party friend; 2004 taking my turn on the dance mat, picture taken by mother; 2016, Paris, France, picture taken by Mike Girolami.
Ever had a mission in life? I’ve had many but I’ve always come back to being a writer. I couldn’t count how many times I’ve begun writing various books and articles, how many writing courses I’ve taken and how much I’ve read on the topic. Have you ever seen the movie “Mr. Hollands Opus”? If not, it’s about a man with a dream but life gets in the way and that’s exactly how I felt for a very long time. In the end it’s my own fault…I’m a busy person. Like “toddler” busy. Ever watch a toddler, they don’t stop except when they’re eating and sleeping. That’s me and my parents instilled this with our busy lives.
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As a kid growing up in the 1970’s life was great – I see myself as the beginning of the spoilt brat generations. My mother bought duplicate toys for each of us kids so she didn’t have to hear us fight over them. Our family did at least one or two vacations every year. I took lots of lessons including Jiu Jitsu, ballet, swimming, figure skating, guitar, and organ; and in the summer I went to day and overnight camps.
Adding to the excitement, my father was a house flipper and moved all over Canada’s capital, Ottawa. What was life like? Torn out walls, no flooring, and wires hanging all over. Once it was finished he’d buy another fixer upper home and start over. My poor mother never unpacked the good china because she never knew what was coming. The cycle was about every year and a half so by the time I was 13 years old I had moved 11 times and went to six different schools. This set the pace for my life! Forty years later I’ve added 11 more moves, 13 educational institutions and close to 40 jobs – that doesn’t include volunteer work. Somewhere in between all that I successfully raised a family, got through cancer, a divorce, and still found time to travel, exercise, get a Black Belt, read hundreds of self-help books, pursued many hobbies and courses; and enjoyed time with my family and friends.
My first 50 years were spent growing up and it was hard work. Life started out with lots of bumps in the road. My father died suddenly when I was 13 and was replaced with a megalomaniac who I actually learned to love and taught me some of my greatest lessons. With a dysfunctional family at home I kept away as much as possible and embraced making money and my friends. My friends became the family I needed and provided a great foundation for me to learn what “normal” families were like, if there is such a thing. It was a difficult time, but growing up as a teen in the 1980’s was exciting and I’m so thankful I was the only person with a camera.
I ended my teen years with a brief bohemian moment by moving to Vancouver in 1986. Getting as far away from my mother was her punishment for kicking me out of the house even though I deserved it. As the youngest and first person of my peers to leave home, I was the first to have that great adventure away from my parents. My intention was to do a lot of reflecting as I wasn’t happy with the person I had become. So I made a list of everything I disliked about myself and began my journey of “fixing” me. This lasted over 30 years. Although I am in perpetual learning mode, in 2020 I felt like I finished that journey when I received my life coach certificate – it was like the bookend to where I had begun all those years ago in Vancouver.
So that’s the first 50 years in a nutshell! I feel like I’ve done so much but what is really intriguing is I’m so excited knowing my potential in the next 50 years. Yes, you read right, NEXT 50 YEARS! I’ve metamorphosed from a spoilt brat, to a messed up teenager which lasted into my 30’s and finally into a “middleagedteen”. So now I write. My mission for the next 50 years is summed up in the below inspirational quote which I could only aspire to leave a legacy like his behind:
When you are young you teach by action, when you are old you teach by word, and when you die you teach by book.
General Choi Hong Hi, founder of Taekwon-Do
Cheers,
Vickie Girolami
April 29, 2021
#middleagedteen #vickiegirolami
comments
This is such a well-written post! The insights you’ve shared are highly relevant for anyone trying to put together the…
Thank you for taking the time to comment and share your thoughts. Happy New Year!
Great read! Thanks for sharing 🙂
Hello Leslie, Thank you for taking the time to comment and thrilled you’re inspired. Stay tuned for more. Cheers, Vickie
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